Analysis of Objections to Using Escorts: Aug 24, 2010
One of the comments in a previous post gave a list of reasons why “unpaid” sex is better than escorts. I believe otherwise and will, once again, answer every point raised.
-A much higher risk of contracting an STD (not all STDs can be prevented by using a condom).
Unless you are having unprotected sex with a streetwalker or crack/meth whore, your risk of getting diseases from paid sex is lower than unpaid sex. The reasons are very simple and related to the profile, income, testing, treatment of escorts and the use of bulletin boards by hobbyists.
The average escort is usually not poor or desperate. Most get tested about once every month and use protection for all penetrative sex, so most traditional STDs are very rare and hard to catch from having sex with them. While HPV (warts) and HSV (herpes) are not totally preventable with condoms, the unfortunate reality is that a very large percentage of young women are already carriers of such diseases- so you cannot win by sticking to ‘unpaid’ sex. Plus both diseases are most transmissible when the woman has active disease or flareups, something that is rare with well compensated escorts who will just take a vacation from the job till it is clears up or is properly treated.
-Loose, lower quality pussy because said girl is constantly fucking all kinds of men.
Surprisingly NO! Loose pussy is related to having kids, and some are just loose to begin with. Some of the tightest cunts I had the pleasure of fucking belonged to young and slim escorts.
-It doesn’t help you get a companion if that is what you want (a girlfriend to hang out with and talk to on a regular day-to-day basis).
Actually, I don’t want to interact with sexually desirable women outside sex and maybe some cuddling.
-No sex on a day-to-day basis unless you can afford to pay the escorts fees every day.
How many guys in a relationship get that anyway? Plus I get a fair amount of freebies/ half-off sessions from some of my favorites, on my terms.
Moreover, I do not turn down decent low commitment sex if it is available. I have had such arrangements for years.
-No raw sex, and we all know that is the best sex.
How many PUAs are stupid enough to rawdog a woman they barely know? In any case, most escorts give BJs without condoms to most clients.
-No woman who fulfills your emotional needs on a day-to-day basis.
How can any guy believe that women can fulfill ANY emotional need. Seriously, what are you smoking?
Comments?
Good rebuttals.
The only problem with escorts IS your own hangup on laying with a literal whore. Namely a person who has sexual relations with LOTS of people, making you just another dick in the cave.
I almost would´ve brought up the money angle, but normal “girls” are just as expensive. Even more so when you factor in the natural drama they create out of sheer boredom it seems.
My experience with escorts in the US has been that they are expensive and lousy in bed. Outside the US I have had a wonderful time.
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Agree!
It depends on the nationality of the escort. American born ones are awful in bed and you have to practically train them yourself.
You neglect the biggest reason normal guys don’t go to escorts – the validation and affection that comes with unpaid pussy.
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Do men actually believe that crap?
Looking towards women for some sort of emotional fulfillmment is costly. The only married guys I know who have devoted, emotionally-supportive wives are guys who pull in enough money that there only concern is not, “Will we lose the house?” or, “Can we afford that medical treatment?” but, “Will we be able to take a vacation this year?” My sister-in law has one of those enormous kitchens that make women weak in the knees, with all high end equipment, and half the time my brother just eats microwave pizza for lunch, while their kids get chicken nuggets.
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Bingo!
Growing up, we were a middle class family, but there were times that money was really tight, and my mother never missed a chance to tell my dad how he was a letdown as a provider.
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Women will gladly stand behind a thug, but always berate an honest provider for not killing himself enough to “make her happy”.
Not to be outdone, my dad felt that his paycheck entitled him to dictate everyone’s actions. It was a real eye-opener into what makes a successful marriage – money. Money is a necessary, but not sufficient, component to keeping unpaid pussy.
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That is why paying for it, upfront, is cheaper in the long run. Plus the pussy is younger, nicer and more fun
“-No woman who fulfills your emotional needs on a day-to-day basis.”
It’s a hard truth to accept, but men need to push all thought of an emotional connection with a woman out of their heads. Even what seems to be the sweetest, nicest girl in the world WILL at some point either 1. Use the emotional connection against you or 2. Lose her attraction to you due to you being emotional. Maybe women were not always this way in the U.S. but they certainly are now. It’s happened to me, I see it happening to all my male friends, and I hear of it happening all the time.
In the end, if you rely on a woman for validation or emotional support you’re looking for a Mommy. Time to take the diapers off and grow up.
Instead of looking to Mommy, use your emotional mind to appreciate/create arts & literature. A piece of art, a book, a movie, or music is not going to dump you for Mr. Thug McRapesalot for not being manly enough. And you might learn something too.
Very true. The Sexual Marketplace (Roissy’s concept) has been so skewed in the west that marriage and in many ways LTRs, don’t make sense anymore.
Point #1: I only know of two guys that have went to escorts/prostitutes, and both have caught STDs.
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Getting anything other than warts from wee-paid escorts is rare. The bulletin boards by hobbyists used for escort reviews constantly alert hobbyists to problem escorts.
Point #2: We could go back and forth on this all day, and it really isn’t worth debating.
Point #3: That is your personal preferrence, and unfortunately, you are in the minority. Most men want a woman to hang out with on a day-to-day basis, hence, why men don’t just go to escorts/prostitutes.
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And they pay for their stupidity.
Point #4: If you aren’t absolutely clueless about women, then getting sex on a regular basis from a girlfriend/wife is easy. Why pay for something if you know how to get it for free?
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If that was the case, escorts would not exist at anything close to the levels they do.
Point #5: Most PUAs want a girlfriend to have unprotected sex with. We’ve all seen it; PUAs talking about player this and player that, only to run off with the very first decent looking girl that is willing to be in a relationship with him. And again, pussy and BJs and two different things. When you want to fuck, you want to fuck.
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How does it work out for most of them?
Point #6: EVERYONE wants someone who is supportive, someone who actually cares about their day to day activities, and someone to make them feel loved. Macho man bullshit aside, it is the truth.
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Yes, but modern westernized women are PREDATORS not supporters. They will fuck you over at the first opportunity, and enjoy your destruction.
Fortunately, I share his preference as well.
Why do a lot of people pay thousands of dollars for PUA bootcamps, if it is so easy?
Absolutely agreed, but I have not yet encountered someone who actually cares about my day-to-day activities, and someone who makes me feel loved.
Regarding STDs, I agree with you; but what do you think of this (should protect against HPV and HSV)?:
http://www.thelatexstore.com/proddetail.php?prod=MB611&cat=21&nav=
http://latexboxers.com/product.html
People pay thousands for PUA bootcamps because of marketing. No one has really flashed up being a man the way that some gurus flash up indirect game. That, and PUAs love the idea of not having to face actual rejection and not having to man up to people.
As for the STD thing, who really wants wear rubber underwear. And again, I absolutely hate wearing a condom, as I can’t feel a thing. I’d much rather be with a fuck buddy or girlfriend that I can go raw dog with.
Assamova’s replies are Marketing 101. Combine shaming language with bashing the direct competitors.
This will be all moot when the sexbot revolution hits.
Wow, being a real mmmaaaan? You mean, like Justin Bieber or something?
I guess you missed David DeAngelo’s “On Being a Man”, David Deida’s “The Way of the Superior Man”, and RSD’s “sex-worthy man” and “deep identity-level change” concepts which brainwashed RSD fanboys like to parrot. The PUA community has been retreating from indirect routines-based game and into pop-psychological make-overs since Mystery’s public exposure.
The thing is, at this point, I do not give a damn either way!
^why most men don’t just go to* (point #3)
Legal prosecution, social indoctrination, need for acceptance, avoiding the loser label.
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Thinking for yourself is harder than commonly understood.
They choose to have relationships, get married etc. and it bites them in the ass over and over again. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again to disastrous results, and expecting that next time, things might be different. Most men, like most people, are stupid. If anything, their behavior is a contraian indicator.
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Agree!
In the end, if you rely on a woman for validation or emotional support you’re looking for a Mommy. Time to take the diapers off and grow up.
******
100% agree.
Women seek men to fulfill their emotional needs, whether it be stability or volitilty, not vice versa or even co dependence.
All of the problems you present would be solved if you just learned to be a man.
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Ya.. sure.
It’s not the woman’s fault if a guy grew up to be a pussy that doesn’t know how to stand up for himself as a man. If you’re getting screwed over by women, then it’s because either A)they have absolutely no respect for you, or B)you have no clue how women think.
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I know how they think, but is there any reason for me to care?
In the long run, it’s cheaper to get a clue, than it is to keep paying high priced escorts and prostitutes.
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In most scenarios it is cheaper to pay.
Men are having the problems that they are with women because no one taught them anything about women. If you feel that you have to work hard in order to get sex from a woman, then you’re approaching it the wrong way. It’s hard because they have no respect for you and instead of coming at them the way that a man should, you keep trying to trick them into having sex and wanting you with all of your gizmos, tricks, and routines.
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What they want is immaterial if they cannot provide what I want on reasonable terms.
And again, let me reiterate how things are with my girlfriend. She pays all of my bills. She spends waaaaaaay more money on me than I do on her. I go out and pick up other women, and she is OK with that. She knows about my blog and is OK with that. She is down for threesomes with other women if that’s what I want. And she basically pampers me like I deserve.
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Good for you, but so what?
PUA = feminism.
It’s ALWAYS the MAN’s fault.
Assanova, you are:
1) a pua guru of sorts
2) black, male, educated, employed (in reading obsidians blog comments this combination is increasingly rare AND highly favorable as time trucks on)
me thinks your situation does not readily apply to the majority of readers
Assanova, your case can be described simply as: luck.
I second that. Ever notice how there are not that many truly ugly PUAs. I’ve found the majority of them are either talln or thin. Kinda like Russian systema martial art. The techniques take a long time to master but the most famous practitioners have such good physical attributes that they make the art seem like the only way to go.
To expand on my point – “In the end, if you rely on a woman for validation or emotional support you’re looking for a Mommy. Time to take the diapers off and grow up.”
Not to get too esoteric, but when men seek an emotional ally and inspirational muse in women, they’re looking in the wrong place. Nobody makes you feel confident, inspired, etc. It’s something that comes from you. Though people places and things can serve as a useful signpost.
Be your own emotional support, and seek inspiration from uplifting arts and sciences. That is a much more dependable and worthwhile means of personal satisfaction than looking to the godforsaken cuntsacks.
At the end of the day, I’d much rather say “I accomplished ____ and my life is better for it” than “Mary Hobag and I stared into each other’s eyes, and my lifelong dream to be an emotional tampon was fulfilled.”
Women are for fun and for fucking. That’s all. The minute she’s not providing that, drop her and find someone else.
“Women are utterly incapable of loving a man in the way that a man expects to be loved.”
This is easily one of the most profound things I’ve ever read from a post on another forum. In it’s simplicity it speaks volumes about about the condition of Men. It accurately expresses a nihilism that Men must either confront and accept, or be driven insane in denial for the rest of their lives when they fail to come to terms with the disillusionment. Women are not incapable of love, they just simply lack the capacity of loving Men in a way that a Man idealizes is possible; in a way he thinks she should be capable of if only he could find the proper means to get her to accommodate him. It is not the natural state of women. Our GFs, our wives, daughters and even our mothers are all incapable of this.
As nice as it would be to relax, trust and be vulnerable, upfront, rational and open, the great abyss is still the lack of an ability for women to love Men as Men would like them to. It’s much healthier to accept that it isn’t possible and live within that framework. If she’s there, she’s there, if not, oh well. She’s not incapable of love, she’s incapable of love as you would have it.
Much of human society as it exists today is based upon a number of big lies. Conventional wisdom in regards to relationships are just one pothole among many. This includes the fractional reserve monetary system, representative democracy, free media, intellectual honesty in some branches of science etc. Certain models fill peoples’ emotional needs in regards to how life works better than others. Evidence that contracdicts conventional thinking is simply ignored.
What people believe, or wish to believe, becomes problematic only when environmental conditions change to a degree that older models become unsustainable and the bubbles burst. The emperor has no clothes. The current student loan game is one example. How many more years will young people go into debt for low paying or non-existant jobs before that paradigm collapses? The very existance of blogs like these indicate what one blogger has coined the “Misandry Bubble” will soon blow up.
Law 32: Play to People’s Fantasies
The truth is often avoided because it is ugly and unpleasant. Never appeal to truth and reality unless you are prepared for the anger that comes from disenchantment. Life is so harsh and distressing that people who can manufacture romance or conjure up fantasy are like oases in the desert: Everyone flocks to them. There is great power in tapping into the fantasies of the masses.
To be educated takes a constant effort. Most people in modern society simply do not have the time, inclination or motivation to be in any way knowledgeable about more than a peripheral understanding of the world around them. The ridiculously ironic part is that we live in an era when communication of information has never been more easily accessible to us.
Now add to this that we’re expected to be at least somewhat well informed due to this access. Our ego-investments with regards to politics, religion, social dynamics, gender relations etc. all depend up a belief that we’re actually well informed enough know what we’re talking about and draw our own conclusions. We would have to be, right? It’s expected of us as intelligent human beings.
The truth of the matter is that unless we are immediately benefitted by educating ourselves about a particular subject (i.e. as short term a profit as easily manageable), for the vast majority of modern society, education is a hobby at best. We live in a fast-food, fast-information society. We can’t be bothered to, or in some cases really afford to, develop critical thinking skills – particularly when they might challenge our own ego-investments. This is why the Matrix exists, it’s easier not to think about things that are counter to our social conditioning.
But we want to be right, and to be right we have to believe that we have these critical thinking skills. In fact our personalities and well being depend upon being correct in our beliefs. The is an age of ego-investment. Ego investments are beliefs we associate with, and internalize, so strongly that they literally become elements of our personalities. So to challenge that belief is to literally attack the personality of the person with that ego-investment. It would make no difference how empirical your evidence to the contrary of that belief might be; you attack the belief and you attack the person. Religion, racism, political affiliation, gender dynamics, social dynamics, world view, all find their roots in individual ego-investments in those beliefs.
Needless to say this has an extremely polarizing effect upon lazy people who’d rather not put forth any effort to objectively educate themselves in ways that would ever challenge their core ego-investments. So we see a factionalizing of people into camps where those ego-investments are reinforced in spite of any controverting evidence. Thus a team mentality evolves; our red team is better than your blue team irrespective of any factor that might be contrary. So long as my team wins and your team loses my ego-investments remain validated. It becomes a clash of who’s ego-investments get validated and any value the “other’s” might have had are never acknowledged.
Assanova wins the debate, BUT only if you can pull ass anywhere near Assanova levels (I’m gunna go out on a limb here and say that’s unlikely for most readers of this blog). Average Joes are far better off going the escort route.
The only other knock against the escort route which I haven’t seen covered here in much detail is the male EGO. If you are able to pull lots of ass you are known as “the man” and it gets you plenty of attention from both men and women. Some guys aspire to this as much as sex itself.
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What is the point of asking for something that you can buy?
Go the escort route and society views you as “that guy that has to pay to get pussy”. DA, I love your brashness to get around the latter point by essentially using reverse psychology and “bragging” about it to women to generate attraction, but that can only take you so far. Most of western society shuns this behavior (for those that actually care what others think – and many do)…..
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But I do not care about their beliefs because, face it, it is not like they will be helpful if you play by their rules. So what is the point?
What gets you good quality, skilled and enthusiastic pussy- caring about other peoples opinion OR paying for it.
There’s just something really emasculating about paying a hooker for sex.
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Ya, being a monkey to get a few scraps of “unpaid” sex is so masculine.
It’s such an Omega behavior. Anyone good with women has sex on a regular basis, whether with a girlfriend, wife, or one-night-stand.
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Tell that to most men.
Overall, the tone of your posts is bitter and angry. Considering misery loves company, I’d say it makes perfect sense that you’re trying to convince people that they should give up in the sexual market like you did.
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I am interested in stuff that WORKS, reproducibly. Everything else is hogwash.
What works… hmmm, ok. How about hanging out with my friends every weekend and actually having fun interacting with women that I don’t have to pay for. They buy ME drinks and food and actually enjoy my company, not just because I paid them. Oh, yeah and they actually LIKE the sex. See, it actually PAYS to be a contributing member of society and not just a parasite, dude. Stop playing WOW and get out and make some friends. Unless you live in a rural area… there’s no one worthwhile out there.
Because it is just awesome hanging out with a bunch of people who wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire and talk about you behind your back when you’re not around. I’ll take buying what I wanted all along.
@Awake – Dude, you must have gotten picked on A LOT in school. Let it go and move on. You’re only holding yourself back.
@pulsotic
All of your arguments are simply appeal to mainstream beliefs and ad hominem attacks.
Pulsotic, that’s a lot of shaming language there. How is DA a parasite? He works for a living. Plus, you having sex with all of these women you say you are hanging out with?
Or are you hanging out with them hoping for sex?
As for the sex, I take it from your comment that it is owed to the contributing members of society who have friends. But what if you are a contributing member of society and have friends, but don’t get sex? (Especially if you live in a rural area where only dregs live!)
A real man is not supposed to pay; he is supposed to prove himself “worthy” of sleeping with a woman, and if he doesn’t he is a loser. Right? But is the test of a man whether he can game/entertain women? The obvious answer is no. And the more men come to realize the answer is “no”, the less people like you will even attempt this shaming nonsense.
If you argued against sluttiness generally on moral/religious grounds, I would understand and agree with you, but this idea that somehow one is not a real man for using whores is ridiculous.
Ok, you got me there. I coulda been nicer. I thought the parasite and rural joke would have been obvious, though.
Good points, and this should answer all of them…
It’s called a Game. So there will be winners and losers. The winners usually have fun and keep playing. The losers end up hating the game and quit because they suck at it (or have the cards stacked against them, ie, disfigurement, WV address). But since it’s possible to learn the Game, and there are so many places to find information, I get exasperated at the lack of motivation and initiative in many people.
To clarify, in my comment earlier I was actually advocating being social. In this life we’re not stuck with what we have, we can change our friends, our location, our job, everything… unless we’ve invested too much already and think we can’t… but that would just be a limiting belief. We do not have to be average chumps. I know too many people that see the glass half full and that 2nd comment was probably me projecting my frustration with them onto DA.
Or did you mean the first one, cuz I meant that.
And crap, the moral grounds thing… ha, I took you seriously up to that.
Bottom line: DA provides a B-line to consistent, quality, drama free pussy. If pussy (with variety) is purely the priority there is no easier or better way.
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Yes, I never said- don’t fuck “unpaid” pussy.
What I am saying is- there are many ways to get pussy and you should exercise ALL of your options to get what you desire.
If you like the “challenge” of chasing tail, want to feed your ego, or attract attention to yourself for being “the man” who “gets girls” then escorts aren’t for you.
Both sides of the argument are legit, depending on what your priorities and motivations are…..
The author is ignoring the down side of paying for escorts, like everything in life things are more complicated than presented. Escorts are expensive, period. The cost for a decent one is around 350 think about 350 * 52 (weeks in 1 year), that is 18,200 cash that COULD be in your bank account. Who honestly spends that much on a girlfriend? Is having an escort weekly even realistic?
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Yes, it is realistic. Only in certain parts of the US are escorts over 300$/hr. In every other country/ city in the western world, escorts are between 150-200$/hr. Plus you do not have to spend money on buying bigger houses, cars etc to get and keep ‘unpaid’ women.
There aren’t 52 good escorts in any one area, so don’t even think you are going to be laying a new hot girl every night.
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Then you don’t know the scene in most large cities.
There is legal and social risk. If you think girlfriends are expensive you won’t believe how much a good lawyer costs.” Just read the reviews”, you say, you think a girl won’t sell out her clients to get a lowered jail sentence?
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Once again, in every other western country- it is either legal or tolerated
Also there is risk of being blackmailed, unlikely but possible. All I’m saying there is risk period. You don’t KNOW these girls, your imagination can’t even begin to tell you how crazy some of them are.
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That is why you avoid streetwalkers and very inexpensive prostitutes.
Escorts aren’t real, they aren’t YOUR real life. They aren’t your friends, they aren’t anything. Any emotion you get from them is FAKE.
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As opposed to ‘unpaid’ women? seriously?
Think about what the difference between having a sex with a real girl and just imagining it with porn is. Is it the warmness of her body, or feeling of her tits? To a certain extended this turns you on more, but the end result is the same orgasm, and porn can do this. The real difference is the emotional aspect.
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It is as real as you want it to be
Doing a beautiful girl once in a while for 350 bucks is totally worthy but as Aristotle once said, balance your life. I’ve had girlfriends give me head every day before work, I’ve had cooked meals ready daily, clothes washed and folded, things bought from girls that are 10 times richer I will ever be, I’ve gotten tickets bought to movies, great not to always have to plan things, Inception, Super bad (who likes going to movies with a bunch of dudes?). I’ve been given amazing sexual experiences from girlfriends who just want to PLEASE me and were not faking it when yelling my name, a girlfriend can suck your dick with absolute passion, sorry guys no matter how much you pay an escort this cannot be bought, this can only be won through game.
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Good for you. But do you see me trying to tell you how to live?
It is just a fact that part of being a man is being able to get girls without paying. Having the social skills, charisma, confidence and manliness to go up to a beautiful girl and have her want you. Part of a man’s self-image is tied to women; it is a fact of biology, a fact of life, true escorts can increase this but they cannot REALLY increase it.
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It is as real ss you want it to be
I HAVE A QUESTION FOR THE AUTHOR. Why have you taken Viagra, to fuck an escort? And don’t tell me it is to extend your SEXUAL pleasure, because as guys we all know that fucking a girl for 30 minutes and fucking a girl for 1 hour is close to the same.
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It helps me get my 60-90 minutes sucking/fucking worth out of every 60-90 minute session- guaranteed.
Author, a great idea for a future post would be to discuss the differences in the escort scenes in different countries. Obviously the USA needs a special section.
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I will write a series of posts on that subject in the next 2-3 weeks.
One gap I see in this blog is that most of your readers are American, but for various reasons America seems to be one of the worst countries for escort use. High costs, it’s illegal, etc…..
America is not as bad as people think for the hired fun scene.
You just have to know how to spot the piggies/bacon brigade/coppers/5th grade dropouts (call them what you will! lol it is easier than you think…) and take a few precautions (show the compensation in the safe and give it to her when session’s over). Generally you find a good indy provider and you are ready to rock.
High school sucked but I think it sucks for everyone.
College taught me a lot about people at their core though. You can try to be good, you can try to be socially accepted and as high-status as you want but in the end, nobody really cares. It is like doing magic tricks for a dog.
Why would and why should I trust my life, finances, and well being to someone who only cares about how I make her feel at specific moments in time and affect her appearance with regards to her peers?
This is gonna cost me far more (in time, stress, and money) than the only thing of value that she has (what’s between her legs).